twenty five.

We are closing in on Blueberry's due date. Our official due date is December 31st, but babies come when they're ready. In all honesty this mama is ready. It'd be super nice if Blueberry decided to make his/her appearance in December and not January. Everything about this pregnancy has been different and that's leading all of us to believe this baby will be a boy. If we were placing bets that'd be the route most people would go. That is most people except Little Love. She is faithfully proclaiming this baby to be a girl because as she states, "I want another sister." Little Love promises that if Blueberry is a boy she'll still be nice and sweet. She says she can't wait to sing and hold the baby. I strongly believe she'll make a wonderful big sister. The two older girls are adamant that Blueberry is a boy. However, that's probably mostly wishful thinking on their part. They love each other very much, and Little Love too, but they're desperately wanting a baby brother. 
W and I know that the sex of this baby doesn't matter. We know that God has big plans for this unborn child. We feel so strongly in this because we knew about this baby in October of last year. He had given me (the mrs) a vision of this baby. I awoke with my heart pounding

nine.

Do you have a giant dream that you wish with all your heart could or would come true? 

What is your one big dream? 

 My one big dream comes to mind quite often. I often daydream about how we could actually make it happen. My biggest dream is to sell nearly everything we own and travel. I want to see more of the United States; to see other countries. How amazing it would be to enrich the girls’ lives by seeing in person the way others live and to see how beautiful and vast the world is. We can read books and look at an atlas all day long but that would never compare to actually seeing the world. When I think about what’s holding us back it’s really only a couple things. How would we pay to live on the road? How could we afford gas, food, etc? How would it affect the big girls’ almost nonexistent schedule with their bio-dad? At least that is an almost easy one to answer: be back to Texas for their birthdays and holiday season, and a few weeks during the summer. So, after thinking that out I suppose it’s nearly a non-issue. The other questions are much harder to answer.

I follow a family of unschoolers on Facebook who do just that.

eight.

I've started writing this blog entry about five different times each time starting out with a different subject. I want to write what’s on my mind but can't find the words. (I probably could if there weren't three loud elephants upstairs screaming at each other and pulling each others hair.) My heart is bursting with words that I don't know how to get out. Life is not perfect; yet I’m content. We have money in the bank; even if it’s only dollars. God has been speaking to me lately. I do wonder if that’s something anyone ever gets use to? There are signs pointing in the direction He wants to lead our family. They are small signs that others would think crazy but to me they are signs nonetheless. When I think of things He’s calling us to do I'm almost certain HE might be crazy. ;) Although when I needed some reassurance a verse came to me, and I don't mean that I thought about this verse, I mean it was sent to me, literally, from an iPhone app. See what I mean? Crazy.